Today was an extremely difficult day to get over with.
When I got up this morning, I accidentally kicked the binder I kept my Desert Storm letters in. Out popped letter #1....the first letter I sent to her...
As late as I already was for work, I decided to pull the letter out, sit down, and read it... longingly looking for the part where I said “So you see, your letter may be short and unimportant to you, but for me, it’s a flicker of light in the midst of darkness”
On Oct 31, it will be exactly 16 years ago when I first wrote those words.
As I reflect back at those words, I remember living in darkness. That light turned out to be the woman I loved. Now that she's no longer in my life, I realize that God should have been that light all along. If I had known that back then, I would have been able to see my way to becoming a man, a husband, and a father after God's own heart.
Wouldn't it be nice if, whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl-Alt-Delete' and start all over?
God will make a way where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see, He will make a way for me
He will be my guide, hold me closely to His side.
With love and strength for each new day,
He will make a way. He will make a way.
By a roadway in the wilderness He leads me,
And rivers in the desert will I see.
Heaven and earth will fade, but His Word will still remain
And we will do something new today.
This is such a beautiful song that I couldn't help but be inspired.
God’s love is so pure that whenever I am at my lowest, I can always be lifted up and know that I am never alone whenever I hear and sing his songs.
My heart is steadfast, O God; I will sing and make music with all my soul. Psalm 108:1
5 comments:
Yes Noel it would be nice to simply press "Ctrl-Alt-Delete", but Noel where would those three blessed children be?
I have been working for a couple of days long hours and when I went to your blog and saw this it makes me very sad!
And where would this precious letter be that was almost sent from heaven itself to you? A letter that you have kept for so long? Please don't give up on that lovely girl who you married Noel..
I can't write no more right now...Love Terry
Here I am again dear Noel..
I visit David Fisher's blog site everyday and I always try to leave a comment but his post"God of the Impossible" on Oct 24, I found it too hard to comment because when I read it the first time I thought of you and wondered if I should tell you about it but I really don't know what you are going through, although it fills me with so much sadness and I feel so unable to help you.How can I comfort you with empty words?
Now the person that wrote these words on David's site would mean much more than anything I can say.
Do you think you could go to David's site and read them Noel?
I hope you do.
pilgrimscribblings.blogspot.com
There's no going back ... only forward and onward. If you were to ever be together again ... it would be as a new you and a new her ... the old has passed away. Try not to beat yourself up with "what if" ... and I should've, could've, would've thoughts. These only serve to defeat your spirit. Keep your eyes focused on Jesus and He alone will fill the void ... then you can go on with whatever blessing He has for you in your future. Now ... you must stand firm and be the best earthly example you can be for your precious children.
Dear Noel...
Mrs Mac IS right and I am so glad that she is so wise.
I felt so in andequate for being of any help.
I am glad that she gave you this advise.
Glad that she cares so much.
I was just thinking about this Bible passage..Philippians 3:13-14..."but this one thing I do,forgetting those things which are behind,and reaching forth unto those things which are before...
I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God."
Sounds exactly like the words that Mrs. Mac wrote to you Noel!
Maybe that is why, with the Lord's help you finally won that race this week. God's blessings to you Noel. always.... From Terry
PS And you DID try your hardest Noel.
Now I can freely say Give up and let God!!
Thank you so much for the encouragement. I'm very blessed to have friends like you.
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